How to Prepare to be Owned








 

I want to be a slave. How can I prepare myself to be owned?

Introduction
Commands and Protocols
Physical Attractiveness
Tattoos
Smoking
Diet
Physical Fitness
Hair
Skin
Female Breasts
Teeth
Pheromones
Feet
Sleep
Entertainment Skills


See Also:Owner Finding, andThe Educational Book List.

Introduction

BDSM relationships are based upon the consent. You will be a slave for only as long as you want to be. It frequently happens people will enter a BDSM relationship as a slave to learn how to own, and train, one and, after having done their time as a slave, leave the relationship to move on to become a Master or Mistress. Many would say this is the best way to learn. Would you want to learn to fly an airplane from an instructor who had never flown one before, and knew about flying only what had been learned in books? Time spent as a slave before becoming a Master or Mistress is the best way to avoid a crash landing as a Dominant with a submissive. And whether a prospective Owner of you has had time as a slave should be criteria to consider.

The degree to which BDSM is practiced varies aliong a continuum from occasional recreation to a full time 24/7 (24 hours a day 7 days a week) lifestyle. Around the occasional recreation end of the range it often happens the partners will switch the Dominant and submissive roles from session to session. At the 24/7 end of the range the roles are, with rare exceptions, fixed, and the submissive lives the life of a full time slave. On this 24/7 end the enslavement is about as real as legally, and practically, can be.

"The captive" by Alfred Plauzeau, 1920

A newly captured girl waits while held by chains, ready to be sold into the slave trade and bought for a harem.

 

For 24/7 relationships Masters and Mistresses choose their slaves as carefully as you should choose which of them you want to be owned by. Early in a Dominant's decision process, it is very common for a Dominant to have an interview with the prospective slave about what that slave can do for them. Providing services to make an owner's life easier, and pleasure usage, are reasons for owning a slave. Below are recommendations to prepare yourself for that interview during which you will need to present reasons to a Master or Mistress considering ownership of you to own you.
Inspection Of The New Arrivals
painting by Giulio Rosati

You know for sure you can be a slave if the prospect of disciplined submission and service is a turn on for you, if obedience to a higher authority makes you feel secure, relieved that you do not have to make decisions, if it feels right for you to be under that authority, and you need an authority over you to provide direction in your life.

Domestic Skills

In a BDSM context 24/7 Master or Mistress, and slave, end of the relationships range it is the owner that decides who will do which domestic tasks. The slave will do all the domestic labor if the owner so decides, and this is usually the case. If not it is the slave that will do the most menial of them. So it is essential to have housekeeping skills. You can prepare for this by studying how to be a butler. A list of books on the subject is here. These books are recommended even if you are to be an owner because an owner should know as much as any slave you own on these matters.

The International Butler Academy
This academy provides a high class two month butlering course in Valkenburg aan de Geul, Netherlands.

Taking tea in the Harem
painting by Rudolph Ernst

Your domestic duties likely will include meal preparation. For physical appearance, and health reasons, it is important to be skilled in cooking that avoids gluten, GMO, excessively high temperatures, and blood glucose spikes. Most especially avoid sugar and most artificial sweeteners. Learn about phytic acid in foods and how to reduce it, and about how diet affects mental performance. This is for both your own sake and your future owner's.

If you are still living with your parents you can practice the skills learned at the above references by using them to aid your parents in those domestic tasks. Pretend to be the slave of your parents. Of course it is best you avoid them knowing why you are so helpful.

Take courses in first aid, and other courses, offered by your local Red Cross chapter.

Study all you can about personal services such as massage, cutting hair, doing nails (if your owner is to be female), how to make soaps and shampoos, gardening, urban homesteading, survival medicine, etc.

Most women feel compelled by fashion to wear shoes that torture their feet, to the point that about one third of them have permanent foot damage (more on this below). Foot pain due to this is very common. Mistresses are no exception and so slaves that are trained in foot massage are highly valued by them. A foot massage is a common scene at dungeon parties. To provide this service it is essential to be trained in it. Many Mistresses will only allow those who have the training to provide this service to them. A web search for "foot massage tutorial" will provide links to information about this.

Your ability to learn, and your performance as a slave, will depend very much on your intelligence. For this reason alone it is essential you avoid marijuana (1, 2, 3 ), pornography, alcohol, and limit television. You should also avoid such users as potential owners of you, just as Little Spider Creations had no choice but to avoid Colorado. This company move from Colorado to South Carolina due to stoned employee's poor job performance. Your owner's performance is crucial. Your owner, being in a leadership role, will be making decisions that will affect both your lives, including providing you structure and discipline. It is in your interest that those decisions be intelligent ones.

Commands and Protocols

Every owner will train their slaves in their own system of commands and protocols. There are owners that have written books about their own systems. Reading them will benefit you with an idea of what to expect. You may find however the specifics of your future owner's system will have major or minor differences. Two such protocol books are:

  1. "Protocols: Handbook for the female slave" by Robert J. Rubel
  2. "Protocols: A Variety of Views" by Robert Rubel PhD

The Gor novels are a series of science fiction novels written by John Norman. Slavery is a theme that figures prominently in them and there is a subculture that lives, as much as practically possible, the lifestyle depicted in them. There are many owners that use the slave position commands described in them regardless of the degree to which those owners replicate the gorean lifestyle. At the time of this writing there are 36 books in the series. It is not necessary to read all of them to learn these position commands. There are web sites that list them, and some of them include "gorean" position commands that are not actually in any of the novels. You can find these sites by using the keywords "gorean slave positions" at the search engines. As for the novels, there is still benefit to reading at least a few of them to get an idea of what it is because the subject of these novels comes up frequently in BDSM communities, there are many web sites devoted to it, and because you should find out if the gorean lifestyle is compatible with you.

There are weekend long events that specialize in training slaves. They are listed here for the USA and here for outside the USA.

Do a web search for "Old Guard Protocol", and "bdsm slave position commands".

In Second Life there is training in how to roleplay a slave. Much of this training is applicable to being a slave in real life. Two such locations are the Gorean Campus, and Gorean University.

A slave's interaction skills in public and the grammatical skill the slave expresses oneself with (when allowed to speak), are indications of the quality of the slave. This in turn has a reflection upon the quality of the owner. Unfortunately grammar is not taught in grammar school anymore. If such terms as predicate, subject, object, direct and indirect object, noun, pronouns, first, second and third person, are unfamiliar to you, if you are a frequent user of double negatives such as "ain't no" (which sounds foolish and uneducated because, technically, it says the opposite of what is intended) start studying grammar. Vocabulary and grammar have a bearing on the accuracy and ease with which one can express oneself, and this will reflect favorably upon you in an interview.

The Emily Post books have long been recognized as the authority on manners and etiquette.

Physical Attractiveness

Having an attractive body to look at is part of the pleasure service to your owner.
Odalisque with Tambourine
(c. 1914)
painting by Adrien Henri Tanoux

Tattoos

Avoid tattoos and piercings, most especially if you are a woman. In the eyes of a vast majority of men tattoos are defacements on the physical attraction of women. Piercings make one less attractive and will prejudice them to believe you are less intelligent. It is why you will rarely if ever see piercings or tattoos on fashion models, performers in high quality pornographic performances, and Las Vegas show girls. The producers know these reduce the marketability of their production. You are no exception. A piercing or tattoo, any piercing or tattoo, will make you "damaged goods" in the eyes of prospective owners, will reduce the number of prospective owners for you, and reduce the odds of your getting the owner you want. There are also health risks associated with them. If after you have seen the information linked to above, you still have doubts, get opinions from several people you know.

If you must have a tattoo consider making it in the location, size, and pattern of any of the slave brands described in the Gor Novels. The tattoo should be of the color a branding would be (avoid unsightly green). Also consider doing it with the easy to remove tattoo inks. These provide the option of later laser removal at lower cost. Images of an actual gorean slave branding are here. Such a tattoo or brand will detract from one's appearance less than others because the meaning of a gorean slave brand is known by many in the BDSM community. These brands identify you as property just as a brand on cattle does.

If you already have any other tattoo remove it.

There are temporary alternatives to the more permanent brands and tatoos to consider such as Henna, Jagua, temporary tattoo pens, and prep resistant surgical marker pens.

Microbranding, which is also known as cell popping,is a method of branding that will fade away in a few years if done right, or much longer or permanent if done wrong.

Smoking

If you smoke, quit. If you do not smoke, avoid starting. There are well known long term health risks to smoking, and it also causes accelerated aging. There are Dominants who avoid owning slaves who smoke, or who have ever smoked. To smoke would eliminate them as future owners of you, and so limit your future possibilities. There are other Dominants who would take ownership of a smoker, but would forbid it, forcing the slave to quit cold turkey which is an uncomfortable thing to do for the nicotine dependent.

Smoking, in the eyes of prospective owners, is a sign of lesser intelligence because information about its health risks is pervasive in society. The pervasiveness makes it impossible not to know them. A valued slave is one who is intelligent enough to care about its health, its future health, and maintaining its physical attractiveness.

It is also necessary to avoid places where there has been smoking. Avoid areas you smell smoke residue. Even that smell, which is also known as "Third Hand Smoke", indicates a harmful toxic environment that will do you very real harm.

E-Cigarrettes are also damaging and so are their second hand vapors.

Diet

Diet has a lot to do with your physical appearance and mental state. It does much to determine your attractiveness, and how rapidly you age. A poor one will cause rapid aging, can cause depression, and will shorten your life. An example of the difference diet and supplementation make is the well preserved beauty of Suzanne Somers. In the picture on this magazine cover she is sixty six years old. Another example is the the well preserved beauty of Christie Brinkley.

Avoid foods that cause blood glucose spikes. These include grains such as rice, and wheat, and of course sugar. Blood glucose spikes cause damage to the pancreas, creates hormones that are a major cause of acne, creates advanced glycation end products that contribute to rapid aging, and creates mouth acids that decay teeth. In growing children it affects the development of the jaw which can cause the need for orthodontal work. Any ingredient name ending in "ose" is a sugar. Examples are sucrose, lactose, maltose, fructose .... avoid them all. Marketers are aware the public is becoming aware of sugar's toxic effects, and so have in some cases made use of euphemisms such as "cane juice". Watch out for this and avoid it.

Avoid gluten containing foods. Among other things gluten is a neurotoxin. Do a web search for "gluten toxin." Also recommended is the information about it at the "Gluten Summit", for which there is a fee but well worth the price. Gluten has adverse effects on everyone, not just those with Celiac disease, or Non Celiac Gluten Sensitivity disease. This diet change is major one but necessary. The Gluten Intolerance Group and the Gluten Society can help with this.

Cutting edge information is here for skin care and here for acne. For general health protocols look here. See also "The Physician's Clinic" here at the Hidden Castle.

See the Energy Times article "Eating for Skin Health" for foods that support general skin health, appearance, and sun protection.

For mental performance, future health, and physical appearance of both genders, it is essential to have in the diet a proper balance of DHA Omega 3 to Omega 6 fatty acids. Most diets are deficient in Omega 3. This deficiency is a cause of heart disease, obesity, and has negative consequences in the development of children's brains.

Most especially important for the physical attractiveness of women is a diet having the proper balance of DHA Omega 3 fatty acids. It is because the curves that attract men are created by the DHA Omega 3 fatty acid stores in a woman's body. Men's personalities have been naturally selected durng evolution to be attracted to this because these Omega 3 fatty acid stores transfer to the developing brain of the fetus in later stages of pregnancy. This enables better mental performance of the future child, which in turn betters the odds of that child's future reproductive success. In this way men who are attracted to that female body shape have genes that nature selects and breeds for. It is why the legs of Cathy Bach were so famous, and why at one time they were insured for one million dollars.

Women often have difficulty understanding this because their brains lack that female attractiveness template wiring. It is in the male's brain only. So they have only social cues to go by in surmising the female body template men are wired for. It is why there are many women who mistakenly emulate fashion models as their ideal and so starve themselves down to similar stick figures, and sometimes so far as death. A most famous case of this is the renown musician, and singer, Karen Carpenter.

I have personally experienced women taking offense to the Psychology Today's article linked to in the Physician's Clinic page about DHA Omega 3 fatty acid stores in the female body. In their reactions to it I have experienced some that ignore how the article makes the case that the template men have is genetically innate to men as opposed to being culturally acquired as evidenced by surveys in isolated cultures, and they cling on to the belief the template is a politically incorrect cultural acquisition. I believe those women have this difficulty because, being women, they do not have this template. So they cling on to what they want to believe. The template is nevertheless very real, innate, and unchangeable by any feminist's attempts at politically correct influence. Natural selection is survival oriented and does not operate according feminist's politically correct tenets. Any woman who ignores the template will lose to those who have accepted the reality of it, and have acted on it.

DHA Omega 3 fatty acids are deficient in most diets because of its higher storage and production costs. Omega 3 fatty acids cannot be preserved as well as Omega 6 can. This deficient diet typically starts as soon as birth because baby formulas are generally deficient in Omega 3. And a mother's breast milk will also be deficient in it if the mother's diet is, and has been, deficient in it. A diet rich in DHA Omega 3 fatty acids (DHA) is vital for anyone of any age or gender.

Sources of DHA Omega 3 are, Flax, Hemp Hearts, buckwheat, quinoa, grass fed beef (grain fed is mostly Omega 6), flax fed chicken, eggs from flax fed chicken, cold water fish that haven't been raised on grain on a fish farm, and grass based foods such as Garden of Life's Raw Meal which contains sprouted grains. They are also available as supplements. If the supplement source is fish oil it needs to be purified by supercritical carbon dioxide fractionation, which is the only low temperature process that avoids the rancidity created by the higher temperature molecular distillation process.

Vegetarian sources of DHA are generally contain insufficient concentrations of it. It will be necessary to consume meats containing it. The Omega 3 For Children website has this article that lists DHA sources.

It is necessary that it be the DHA type of Omega 3. Not all Omega 3 fatty acids are. Chia seeds have Omega 3 content, but not the DHA type. The other types of Omega 3 are ALA and EPA and while they are important components of any diet, it is DHA that is the brain food.

Omega 3 fatty acids become rancid rapidly. They are difficult to store. This is why I do not recommend the use of store bought buckwheat flour for bread making. It has a bitter taste because by the time it reaches the store shelves it is rancid. It is better to purchase the grain and use a machine to grind it into flour. The flour has to be consumed in a few days.

Grass fed beef, is difficult to find at supermarkets. Farmer's markets are more likely to have them.

For more information there are the books "It Starts With Food: Discover the Whole30 and Change Your Life in Unexpected Ways" and  "Food Forensics: The Hidden Toxins Lurking in Your Food and How You Can Avoid Them for Lifelong Health"

Physical Fitness

Whether male or female, a physically fit body is attractive. Female examples of this are Alicia Silverstone, Ronda Rousey, and Holly Holm. Study body building and work out regularly. Do a web searches for "Metabolic Training", "Metabolic Resistance Training", "Metabolic Conditioning" and "interval training".

I am unaware of any studies about whether women have a template for men just as men do for women. But it would would make sense for them to be attracted to bodies that would be good hunters and protectors. I can surmise through anecdotal evidence that it does exist. The success of the Chippendale Dancers is such evidence. The template appears to be strong arms and legs, broad shoulders, an inverted Christmas tree torso, and six packs on the abdomen. Physical attraction will initially attract women to men, but while physical attraction of women is sufficient for men to maintain interest, it is insufficient for women to maintain interest in men. Women are ultimately attracted to men in accordance with Briffault's Law. A dramatization of Briffault's Law at work.

There is a lot of information in books and online about body building. It is best to be informed on how to body build before heading to the gym. Rapid muscle growth requires doing several weight lifting sets every workout. There are also legal supplements that enhance progress. Avoid illegal supplements. They are illegal for a reason. They are a Faustian deal with the devil in that they offer a temporary near term benefit and future long term destruction.

Kegel exercises are for strengthening the muscles of the pelvic floor. This muscle group includes those around the vagina. Strengthening here can make a non orgasmic woman orgasmic, will enhance sexual pleasure for both herself and her partner as it enables her to squeeze with greater force. It is possible for a vagina to become strong enough to trap a penis inside it, allowing the female to control when the male may withdraw. For men, Kegel exercises will enhance erections, and enable premature ejaculation prevention.

Men are most attracted to females wtih the hourglass bodies as described by the ancient architect Vitruvios. The hourglass figure a ribcage about as wide as the hips such that the arms can hang down naturally without resting on the hips, and narrower waist.  Narrower upper bodies are described as spoon shapes. This article is about shaping avatars for game playing, especially in Second Life, and other grids:

A Matter of Proportion

So you were born with a spoon shape body, and you want it to have a Vitruvian hourglass shape. What to do?

You can still have an hourglass shape if you go to the gym, or purchase a weight lifting set, and build up your trapezius, deltoid, latissimus dorsi, and pectoralis major, muscles. Gymnasts generally always have an ideal Vitruvian body proportions due to this, an example of this is Jade Carey.

Building these muscles do not actually broaden the rib cage of course, but does effectively create the desried attractive appearance.

Men will also benefit from such body building because women are attracted to broad shoulders. Ten reasons why women prefer muscular men.

Hair

If you are a woman it is important to have at least shoulder length hair. To the subconscious male mind long dense hair is a sign of health and so men are attracted to it. It is one of the reasons Farrah Fawcett got so much attention. Large feathered headdresses are attractive on showgirls because to the subconscious male mind those headdresses are hair. It is why retailer La Senza Lingerie refused to pay Eva Herzigová a $36,000 modeling fee. La Senza Lingerie considered the photos taken of Eva to be useless because Eva had shortened her hair. In the Game of Thrones series it is the significance of the character Cersei Lannister's hair cutting scene just before her Walk of Shame, and for character Daenerys Targaryen's long hair.

Hair loss is a sign of toxic heavy metals in the body. How to avoid and eliminate heavy metals.

Humans have lost most body hair except on the head because on the head it acts as cushion against blows, cuts, and sunburn. Similarly male lions have manes to protect against the claws of an opposing lion.

Hair length is one of the ways a male can quickly determine a person's gender, a socially important thing to do, and the first thing a male does when a person comes into view.

Men traditionally have had short hair because for about all of human evolution it is the expendable males that did the hunting and warfare while the unexpendable females stayed in the relative safety of the camp to look after children. In combat long hair is disadvantageous because it is something for an opponent to grab. When long haired women physoically fight one of the things they do is grab her opponents hair. This grabbing is also a reason for having short or no beards.

Vitamins that promote good hair and skin are PABA, Inositol, Biotin, and Pantothenic Acid.

Skin

Olive oil taken topically and internally repairs skin, protects skin, and promotes skin health. There are soaps, body lotions, and shampoos that contain olive oil. These are recommended. There are three soaps that, besides including olive oil, also include the parasite and fungus fighting oils Neem, Lavender, and Tea Tree. Soaps that have these are Chagrin Valley's "Neem & Tea Tree Body & Hair Shampoo", Poppy Soap Company's "Neem Tea Tree", and Dancing Bare 's "Lavender/Neem Soap".

The above soaps can act as a defense against scabies and ringworm, and as a treatment for these existing infections. Gyms are notorious as places to acquire such infections. To be an effective defense and/or treatment it is necessary to lather it on the skin areas to be defended or treated and let dry without rinsing it off. For the gyms this should be done on at least the entire legs. Once these soaps are removed by rinsing or soaking they are no longer a defense or effective treatment.

The Life Externsion Foundation has a section on how to prevent skin aging.

Most appearance of skin aging is due to ultraviolet light exposure from the sun and other sources such as fluorescent lighting. The conventional wisdom is to use sunscreen to protect against this. But most sunscreens have chemistries that actually damage the skin, get absorbed, and spread their harm internally throughout the body. The best protection is to acclimate your skin by gradual increases in exposure length. There are oral nutrients that protect against sun exposure. Topical vitamin C has skin rejuvenative effects. The sun should not be avoided entirely, because to do so may result in insufficient vitamin D. The right amount of sun exposure can actually have protective effects against skin cancer. Too little, or too much (enough to cause sunburns), will cause it. When exposed to any amount of ultravolent light it is essential to have taken the protective oral nutrients.

Dermarolling can improve acne scars, hypopigmentation, and reverse some of the effects of skin aging.

Female Breasts

Avoid wearing brassiere. Cooper Ligaments support and hold up breasts. When no longer burdened by the weight of the breasts they atrophy which causes them to sag once the brassiere is removed. There are also adverse health effects due to brassiere. "Are You Dressed To Kill? The Link Between Breast Cancer and Bras".

Teeth

The Slave Market (c. 1884)
painting by Jean-Léon Gérôme
Since ancient times, one of the first things inspected on a prospective slave, or newly acquired slave, is the mouth and the teeth. We are living in an unfortunate era where for the most part it is expected you will get cavities that must be drilled out by a dentist and filled with either a toxic mercury amalgam, or a white composite, until eventually the teeth's central nerves die, followed by root canals, crowns, and implants. It does not have to be that way. Tooth decay is the result of poor diet and personal dental care. Even the need for orthodontic work is the result of poor childhood diet. With the right care, and that includes diet, the body is capable of preventing and repairing cavities and abscesses on its own, just like most any other superficial wound.

Recommendations for teeth preservation and attractive appearance:

  • Remineralization of teeth requires the blood be rich in minerals. The modern diet, just as it is with most other nutrients, is deficient in minerals. It is essential that mineral supplements be taken. If there is not sufficient minerals in the diet the reverse will happen, the teeth and bones will demineralize.
  • Avoid acids, these will dissolve your teeth. Phytic acid is a plant acid in grains, nuts, and beans, that cannot be completely avoided yet should beminimized. It will remove calcium from your teeth, from other foods you eat, and when in the gut it will initiate a process to remove it from your blood and bones. Take steps to avoid it where you can, and greatlyreduce it in foods where you cannot. Avoid also the phosphoric acid that is in many soft drinks.
  • After mealswait thirty minutes to one hour before brushing. The mouth must be given time to neutralize acids, or your brushing will push those acids into the tooth's enamel. During the wait a beneficial things to you teeth that can be done is rinse it out either with water, or better yet an acid neutralizing solution of one part baking soda to eight parts water, and to cover well you teeth with saliva.
  • Avoid between meal snacks. These will disrupt the healing work the saliva needs to do on the teeth between meals.
  • There is a controversial theory that glycerin in toothpaste blocks reminerilization. This isnot supported by any evidence. Nevertheless beware the theory exists.
  • Avoid fluoride. Thisdamages the teeth.
  • Avoid sugars, and rapidly converted carbohydrates which are grains, and starches. Oral bacteria instantly convert these to acids.�tzi the Iceman's teeth's advanced state of decay is attributed to a diet rich in grains.
  • Your mouth has amicrobiome that when properly balanced will contribute to healthy teeth. A proper diet that included probiotics means a healthy oral microbiome.
  • There are tooth powders used for brushing teeth with probiotic, and acid neutralizing. ingredients. One such powder isTheraneem Tooth and Gum powder.
  • Peaches and nectarines have pits that very often break apart before the these fruits are opened. If these fruits are eaten by directly biting into them these pit fragments can crack and chip your teeth when chewed on. Always cut these apart with a knife and inspect for pit pieces before delivery to your mouth.
  • There are raw agricultural bean products that will have stones in them. Most often these are sold in bulk at low cost. If these are to be consumed every bean will have to be inspected before cooking or it is inevitable a stone in them will crack and chip your teeth.
  • Lentils very often have small stones or sand in them that will damage your teeth. I recommend lentils be avoided entirely.
  • Chia seeds very often have grains of sand in them.
  • Thoroughly wash lettuce, kale, and the like before consuming them. These very often come with sand in them.
  • There dangerous levels ofmercury vapor in most dental offices. The mercury in fillings also doesharm.
  • Get your dental care from a dentist who is skilled at healing teeth, not just drilling them as most are. A recommendation for one can be requested at theInternational Foundation for Nutrition and Health.

Pheromones

Humans have sex attractant pheromones just as animals do. There are human sex attractant pheromone colognes and perfumes.

Feet

Toes crammed by body weight into a narrowing toe box. A damaged foot with bunion.

Correctly fitting shoes are important to maintain an attractive appearance of the feet. To avoid the creation of bunions avoid shoes that are too narrow, high heeled shoes, and especially high heeled ones with pointed toes. Body part models who model their feet will never wear high heels. If the desire to wear them cannot be resisted, then wear them as little as possible and do a web search for "how to wear high heels" to prepare for when you do. The damage happens quickly, and can happen during a single wearing. High heels have caused permanent damage in about one third of the female population. The damage includes shortened tendons, bunions, bone spurs (such as pump bump, or heel spur), and nerve damage.

In this Air Talk interview titled "Mary Karr on our conflicted relationship with and the hazards of high heels" Mary Karr discusses her New Yorker article about high heels:

"Crippled feet, podiatrist visits and shooting pains up the legs -- are high heels worth the lovely lengthening of the legs? In The New Yorker, Mary Karr writes of her conflicted relationship with the stiletto and what it represents. Karr says that while women stand tall in sky-high pumps, the coveted shoe ultimately brings them down."

Sleep

Inadequate sleep ages the body, and the body's physical appearance. On the face it will cause crows feet. A sign of fatigue is depressions just under the eyes, which are known as " sunken eyes" or "hollow eyes", and dark semicircles under the eyes which is the result of shading due to a change in skin texture. If the fatigue is chronic the sunken eyes will become permanent, and get deeper and larger.

There is no single magic bullet solution to insomnia. Solving it requires a combination of good sleep practices which are listed below:

Dave Rubin interviews neurologist Mathew Walker about sleep.

The Gilded Cage (c. 1908)
painting bySaint George Hare
  • The body has a timer that governs sleep and wake cycles. This is known as theCircadian Rhythm. It is necessary to maintain this rhythm by going to sleep at the same hour every night.
  • The body synchronizes its circadian rhythm withblue light receptors in the eyes. Avoid looking at blue lights several hours before sleep.Gunnar makes blue light filtering eyewear for use when viewing computer monitors.
  • In the morning expose yourself to blue light. If possible let daylight into your bedroom.
  • It is best to synchronize your sleeping hours with night hours, and be awake during daylight. The circadian rhythm tends to synchronize with day and night.
  • Melatonin is a sleep hormone the body releases during the sleep part of the Circadian Rhythm. Sleep can be induced, and the circadian rhythm synchronized, by usingmelatonin supplements.
  • Mental discipline is required for good sleep. To fall asleep it is necessary to relax and shut down the personal narrative. Meditation training will assist with this. There are guided meditation recordings available for free download onYouTube.
  • Binaural Beats, and Isochronic Tones, are sounds that will adjust your brain waves to its sleeping frequency. To be effective each ear must hear only its own stereo channel. There arehead phones designed for sleeping in. Binaural Beats, and Isochronic Tone, recordings are available as free downloads onYouTube. One does not necessarily fall asleep listening to them. It does help if one hears them for awhile just before sleeping.
  • Avoid eating anything, or drinking anything with calories, several hours before bedtime. Make dinner the last time you eat during the wakefullness part of your daily schedule. Food will act tosynchronize the Circadian Rhythm. Late meals and snacks throws off the sleeping schedule you want to keep.
  • Sex is a sleeping aid for bothmen andwomen. It stimulates the release of sleep inducing hormones.
  • Heavyphysical exercise helps sleep.

There is information about solving insomnia at the Life Extension Foundation, The Sleep Institute, Sleep.org, and The National Sleep Foundation. The Los Angeles Sleep Institute specializes in treating insomnia.

The Sleep Shephard device is is designed to measure brainwave frequency and use it as feedback to provide the optimum binaural beat to lead the brain toward sleeping brainwave frequencies.

A sleep tracker is a device worn during sleep that measures the quality, and length, of sleep. They can indicate medical problems that disrupt sleep. Information on various types of sleep trackers, and the medical problems they can detect, is in this article.

Entertainment Skills

Train in musical instruments such as piano and violin. There are piano keyboards available that work with your computer, and there is software that trains you to play them. Musician's, especially pianists, are always popular at social events. There is music training software for a variety of instruments which can be found at the search engines.

Dancing skills are especially important for the female. The evolutionary reason for the dance is to invoke a male watcher's mating behavior, and so it is an important part of sexual pleasure service to your owner. Most animals have courtship displays. Humans are no exception. The human eye and brain is generally designed to pay attention to motion in a visual field. Gyrating female hips while in dance or walk, and downward waves of torso motion, advertise to the male subconscious the ability to have children. This causes his innate mating behavior (instincts) to be invoked. It is for humans the female's mating dance, or courtship display. Major ones that do a lot of hip gyration are Mideastern Belly Dance, South Seas Hula, and to a lesser extent American Go Go.

Belly dance example performances, instruction, and music is available on YouTube videos. Costumes, equipment, and instructional video disks are available here.

Dancing is a strenuous activity that contributes significantly to physical fitness.

Once skilled enough there is the prospect of doing paid performances. How to become a professional belly dancer.

The Blue Veil
painting by Fabio Fabbi

Mating behavior invocation in response to watching a mating dance is not just an instinct men have. Women also have this instinct, as evidenced by Chippendale Dancers and the lower body motions Elvis Presley did during his performances.

Study all you can about providing sexual pleasure, especially Tantric Sex and Kama Sutra.

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